In which there is elevator conversation.

"So this girl, does she go here?"

"Nah."

"Oh, okay. What's her name again?"

"Venice."

"That's a city. That can't be her name."

"Yeah, I know. That's what I told her."

"It used to be a city-state. Now it's a city."

"Yeah."

OH COLLEGE.

Though we adore men individually, we agree that as a group, they're rather stupid...

It is time to discuss the totally fantastic woman that is Winifred Banks.

And...yes. I'm choosing to talk about her as if she is a real person.

For those of you who don't recall the superb Mrs. Banks, she was the mom in Mary Poppins. You know, the one with blonde hair and an absent-minded streak? This lady:

Even though I know her character is basically used to poke fun at the women's suffrage movement (oh, look at the silly British housewife, isn't it nice that she has this "votes for women" thing as a hobby? how cute), I cannot help but completely adore her.

I mean, this is someone who when confronted with cannon fire which shakes her entire house, shouts, "Posts everyone!" and proceeds to hold back the piano as it attempts to roll across her floor. This is someone who takes everything in stride-- from her ridiculously grumpy husband, to the nanny who floats into the front garden and proceeds to be casually magic, to a house full of dancing chimney sweeps (towards the end of this clip? like, around 6:50-- yeah, if my house every suddenly fills with dancing chimney sweeps, I hope to deal with it half as well as our lovely Mrs. Banks does):

Basically, I find it delightful that she's so laid back about the impossible things that happen to her over the course of a two hour, forty minute film. I can't not love her. And if you can manage to hate her-- or even be apathetic towards her?-- I don't want to hear about it, because it will just make me SAD.

And, to top it all off, she firmly believes in her crusade for women's votes, even if the filmmakers kind of...didn't? Basically, she is a WONDROUS HUMAN BEING.

Even though she doesn't exist.

In which I choose my political party based on anagrams, Christopher Walken is just weird, and I try to prepare Puyallup for my awesome.

Just for the record:

o1. "Republicans" anagrams to "a sniper club." And "democrats" anagrams to "smart code."

I feel officially justified in my political affiliations.

o2.

Christopher Walken, who is simultaneously terrifying and hilarious. Christopher Walken, who is a riddle, wrapped in an enigma, shrouded in a mystery. Christopher Walken, who, bafflingly, busted out the song and dance in the 2007 version of Hairspray. Christopher Walken, who, in the above video, reads the lyrics to "Poker Face."

o3. I am coming home in 37 days. Hope you're ready for me, Puyallup.

Although, really. No one is every prepared for the sheer awesometasticness that is my presence.

And yeah, I just said "awesometasticness." In reference to myself.

How cool is that?

In which the Yankees just really need to lose.

"I believe in the Church of Baseball. I've tried all the major religions, and most of the minor ones. I've worshipped Buddha, Allah, Brahma, Vishnu, Siva, trees, mushrooms, and Isadora Duncan. I know things. For instance, there are 108 beads in a Catholic rosary and there are 108 stitches in a baseball. When I heard that, I gave Jesus a chance."

If anyone can offer me a religion with a god devoted specifically to ensuring Yankees' losses, I will convert right this very minute.

BOOOOOOO. :[

The quote, for the record, is from Bull Durham.

Yeah, we can't lie. There's only one true way to define "cool."

Here, let me make your day better times infinity.

YEAH.

o1. "Jane, you ignorant slut."

http://www.hulu.com/watch/2306/saturday-night-live-point-counterpoint-lee-marvin-and-michelle-triola

o2. "PLAIN TALK." Eric Idle!

http://www.hulu.com/watch/4134/saturday-night-live-gibberish

o3. "I'm a cherry farmer, just kidding I'm a cherry scientist, just kidding I'm a grape scientist, just kidding, grapes study me and I've seen the reports!"

http://www.hulu.com/watch/98322/saturday-night-live-update-judy-grimes

o4. Too sexy, for the other, things! Sidenote: the quote? Palin-esque.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=723UgVWoicw

o5...I don't even know. Watch Glee.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5n1615vnUIQ

o6. THIS IS COOL. DON'T DENY IT. THEY ARE BENDING THE FABRIC OF SPACE AND TIME. THIS IS THE STUFF OF LEGENDS, ETC. & ETC.

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/10/17/nyregion/17minute.html?_r=1&hp

In which there isn't actually that much stuff going on, but I share anyway.

My life?

I don't know. It's possible the point of this blog is to occasionally mention what is actually happening in my life.

I CAN TOTALLY DO THAT.

Okey doke.

Well, I go to college now, as is pretty evident from the posts previous to this. In eleven days, I will have lived in D.C. for two months. That's pretty weird, folks. Not sure what to think of it. Here's what I do know, though: when I've lived here for two months, it's also two months until I get to come home and visit! 

That's pretty fantastic, so I guess the two-month marker is acceptable to me. ;]

The other night? This happened:

Accompanied by the sound of footsteps sprinting down the hall, a guy shouts, "Where are you?!"

There is a pause, in which the suspense is totally killing me. No seriously, where is this mysterious person? And why was the shouting necessary? Because it's like, four in the morning. I'm assuming some incredibly important stuff is happening here. 

Only, the next thing random hallway guy says is, "I don't know. I just...wanted to talk? I guess?"

There is another pause, in which I am rather annoyed with hallway guy. He just wanted to talk? Because I am prepared to reassure all of you, gentle readers, that he could've talked to whoever was at the other end of that line PRETTY MUCH WHENEVER. And that does include times which aren't four in the morning.

"Yeah...doesn't really matter? I just...yeah, no. Bye."

Alright college. Go ahead and provide me with people making unfortunate telecommunication choices just outside my door before its even light outside.

I CAN TAKE IT.

Also! I'm working now. That is a relatively new development. I'm doing secretarial stuff for an education non-profit called Higher Achievement. Neat-o! 

Ummm. I'm probably going to change my major to Political Science. That is also neat-o? 

I have a mid-term tomorrow. It's about RUSSIA. Oh Russia. Why do you have so much history? Can't you just have existed for, like, a hundred years and done nothing?

Because my life would be easier then. More boring, yes. But easier!

Okay, obviously, I got nothin'. People do interesting things in college, but I am not one of them.

I'M COMING HOME IN TWO MONTHS. I'M EXCITED. SHUT UP.

In which I wonder what to do with college, actually don't want to drink, and have grown-up aspirations.

Oh college. What am I going to do with you? 

o1. I always forget how long it takes me to make friends?

Yeah. It takes me forever.

o2. I feel like I am definitely in the wrong residence hall. I mean, I have nothing against the people here on general principles, it's just that they all want to drink and I don't. I'm sure that's a generalization, but apparently my dorm (and my floor) is known around campus as being the "party" dorm. 

I HAVE NOTHING AGAINST THESE PEOPLE. THEY SEEM LIKE REALLY NICE PEOPLE.

But our social interests do not intersect. :[

o2a. 

(Yes, this is o2, sub-part a. Shut up.)

Dear people who look at me like I am a sad, repressed person when I say I don't want to drink: 

The fact that I'm not drinking doesn't actually mean that I'm a depressingly straight-laced goody-two-shoes. OTHER things about me definitely indicate that, certainly, but this is not one of them. I think the drinking age should be lowered! If I wanted to drink? I would've done it by now. This is not a fear of breaking the rules holding me back. I actually don't think drinking sounds fun. 

Sorry if that bursts your bubble? It's not like I'm trying to stop you. 

o3. I know what I want to be when I grow up! :]

Ask me about it sometime. I WON'T BE ABLE TO STOP TALKING.