In which there are movies, movies, and a couple more movies.

Mooooooovies! 

(Okay, so I don't know why some of these are getting cut off, nor do I know how to fix it. But! If you right click, you can choose "watch on YouTube" from the drop down menu, so if it's really impacting your Viewing Experience or something, go ahead and do that. :])

Movies I Want To See (some of them are released already, some aren't):

o1. 

o2. 

o3. 

(Oh look it's every famous person you've ever seen ever!)

o4. 

(Alexis Bledel I miss yoooooooou!)

o5. 

(Yes, okay, I know, everyone in the world wants to see this movie, apparently. WHATEVER, SO DO I.)

o6. 

Movies I've Seen That You Should Really Want To See Too:

o1.

o2.

o3.

(Sooooo muuuuuuch fuuuuuuun.)

o4.

(Oh come on, you know you loved this one when you saw it; or, alternatively, you haven't seen it yet and ought to be ashamed.)

o5.

(If there was ever a time when I wasn't in love with Kermit, it ended when I saw this movie. Oh Muppets. ♥)

And A Couple of "Yeah, I Might Spend My Money On That," Picks:

o1.

o2. 

(Heeeeeee, Ricky Gervais and Tina Fey and Rob Lowe!)

In which it is (still) too hot, UChicago and I weren't mean to be, and I warn of future Attempts At Humor.

I've decided to make up for the fact that my previous post was, in summary: blargh, it's too hot, ahhhhh college, oh, and also, hippos!

That might've made for interesting reading-- who am I to say?-- but you know, truthfully it didn't make for interesting writing, which might be the point of this whole thing in the first place. ;]

"Albert Einstein once said, 'The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and science.' Propose your own original theory to explain one of the 16 mysteries below. Your theory does not need to be testable or even probable; however, it should provide some laws, principles, and/or causes to explain the facts, phenomena, or existence of one of these mysteries. You can make your theory artistic, scientific, conspiracy-driven, quantum, fanciful, or otherwise ingenious—but be sure it is your own and gives us an impression of how you think about the world.

Love, Non-Dairy Creamer, Sleep and Dreams, Gray, Crop Circles, The Platypus, The Beginning of Everything, Art, Time Travel, Language, The End of Everything, The Roanoke Colony, Numbers, Mona Lisa’s Smile, The College Rankings in U.S. News and World Report, Consciousness."

If I could add to that list, I might suggest that some high school senior, aspiring to attend UChicago (because yes, this is one of their past essay prompts), explain the deep mysteries behind such phenomena as Sunday afternoons, the Beatles, fake wood grain, baseball (related: that particular hope which springs eternal in the hearts of Cubs fans), and Wyoming. 

Oh UChicago. You and I weren't meant to be, but I think there's a reason no one believes me when I say I'm not sad about it-- and the reason is that you're awesome. I'm really not all that sad about it though, and I'm going to proclaim that one more time to the internets, just to see if anyone's listening who'll buy it.  

Anyway, the point of this post was, I may have to do something about this. I'll admit to being weirdly sad when I realized my days of writing college essays were over-- at least it meant I was writing. I got into the terrible habit of not writing unless someone made me, which just is not on. And truthfully, even that's only part of it, to cover up the unseemly truth: I honestly enjoyed writing the damn things.

Anywho, expect to see something from me within the next week or so probing the untold stories of Non-Dairy Creamer, or The Platypus, or probably both. It will probably involve lots of Capitals For Emphasis, and Attempts At Humor. Just to warn you. ;]

In which there are flying, purple hippos, several sentient pumpkins, and an excellent milkshake.

Let me start off by saying: the title of this post is a complete and total lie-- none of the things mentioned are contained herein. I have never met any sort of hippopotamus, let alone a flying or a purple one; the most contact I have with pumpkins is when I carve them up on Halloween, and thank goodness those aren't sentient; and as much as I would appreciate a good milkshake right now, since it's 81 degrees in my house, I haven't got one. 

Here's some quick musings on what I have got!

Thing One: A month until I leave for school.

Musings: HolycrapohmygodwhatamIgoingtodonoseriouslyWHOA. 

Thing Two: An 81 degree house.

Musings: Are you kidding me? :[ 

In this glorious and modern world we live in, containing the technology which gives me the ability to simultaneously blog and lie sprawled on a couch with the fan on, thinking thoughts of the Arctic, there is such a thing as air conditioning.

Tragically, my family hasn't got it.

But rumor has it, my dorm will!

Allow me to revise my musings for "Thing One" to include: airconditioningplease?

Thing Three: Days when there is nothing like a little ridiculously-funny-because-it-shouldn't-be-so-ridiculously-funny humor.

Musings: http://www.thedailyshow.com/watch/mon-may-18-2009/daily-colbert---keyboard-cat

In which I love quotes, Jean Houston loves laughter, and children love hamsters.

My top ten quotes of the moment, in no particular order. Is it anyone else's life goal to be quotable someday? I think it might be mine. ;]

Emily's Top Ten Quotes

o1. To repeat what others have said, requires education; to challenge it, requires brains. 

-- Mary Pettibone Poole

Because: Education vs. intelligence is clearly the debate of the summer. ;]

o2. Whatever you may be sure of, be sure of this: that you are dreadfully like other people.

-- James Russell Lowell

Because: All your thoughts have already been thought (and your reaction has already been had).

o3. You get fifteen Democrats in a room, and you get twenty opinions. 

-- Senator Patrick Leahy

Because: I wouldn't have it any other way. 

o4. Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity. And I'm not sure about the former. 

-- Albert Einstein

Because: You tell 'em Al. You tell 'em. 

o5. I am prepared to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter. 

-- Winston Churchill 

Because: It's hilarious. Oh Winston. He clearly had to develop a sense of humor in reaction to his name, if nothing else. 

o6. Success is liking yourself, liking what you do, and liking how you do it.

-- Maya Angelou

Because: There are some things it is useful to remember as I trot off to college, and this is one of them, and because it's always nice to have someone state what I believe so succinctly. 

o7. With those who don't give a damn about baseball, I can only sympathize.  I do not resent them.  I am even willing to concede that many of them are physically clean, good to their mothers and in favor of world peace.  But while the game is on, I can't think of anything to say to them.

-- Art Hill

Because: If I had to make a list of top ten things I love (and maybe I will someday), the Mariners would be on it, whether they're winning or losing. The fact that they're winning lately just makes loving them more fun.

o8. It is better to have loved and lost than never to have lost at all. 

-- Samuel Butler

Because: Among many other reasons, because it's a classic.

o9. There is no reciprocity. Men love women, women love children, and children love hamsters.

-- Alice Thomas Ellis

Because: I may not find it to be entirely true as I live my life, but I will always find it entirely hilarious. 

1o. At the height of laughter, the universe is flung into a kaleidoscope of new possibilities.

-- Jean Houston

Because: Just because. :]

In which mavericks are maverick-y, and I cannot stand Sarah Palin.

Top Ten Reasons Sarah Palin Might Have Stepped Down As Governor

o1. She wants to hike the Appalachian trail.

o2. She's had enough of monitoring the Russians, and wants to move to the East Coast, where she can keep an eye on those crafty Greenlanders. 

o3. She needs the maximum amount of time to herself to brainstorm the names of her next five children; being Governor really used up the creative energy she needs to come up with such gems as Track, and Trig.

o4. Being Governor of the great state of Alaska took too much time away from her hobbies-- like hunting moose, banning books, and throwing down with David Letterman.

o5. Mark Sanford isn't too geographically savvy-- he thought he was in Argentina, but was, in fact, in Alaska. Oops?

o6. Having verified exactly what the difference is between a hockey mom and a pit bull, she feels the need to do some research into what the difference is between a hockey mom and other animals, all over the world. Yes, Sarah Palin's going on safari! 

o7. She's noticed her accent slipping recently, and needs time away from the public eye to practice leavin' the Gs off the ends of her words.

o8. She figured all the cool governors were doing absolutely insane things (Blagojevich? Sanford?), and wanted to become part of the perfect Alaska to Illinois to South Carolina, "crazy governor trifecta."

o9. She misses seeing Tina Fey on SNL, and wanted to give her a reason to come back. 

1o. She's just bein' a maverick. It's politics as usual to serve yer full term as governor, and by gosh, Sarah Palin doesn't listen to those liberal, heathen, Muslim, terrorist, pushers of "politics as usual." She's lookin' at you, Katie Couric.

(Actually, this one was pretty much her reason.)  

In which Facebook is not perfect, I demand equal opportunity insanity, and Emily Dickinson wasn't as crazy as you think.

Facebook, we need to talk. This quiz as fab as it is (and oh, it is fab) has one unfortunate flaw.

Crazy female writers are drastically underrepresented!

You can't tell me the world hasn't seen its fair share of female authors who were just a tad off-kilter. I'm demanding equal opportunity acknowledgment of insanity!

So here's a quick rundown of the crazier women who have put pen to paper.

(A note: I totally respect all these writers-- yes, even Bronte, much as I hate Jane Eyre. They all impacted literature, in one way or another, and they are all largely respected by the global community today. Seriously, they're cool. This is just meant to be fun.)  

Sylvia Plath:

Ms. Plath was a bit of a headcase, but honestly, she had her reasons. Her father died when she was eight, for starters. But that didn't stop her from getting her work published in literary magazines as a teenager, or from getting a scholarship to Smith College, where she continued to write successfully. Of course, successful writing usually just points to having some variety of tortured soul, and Sylvia didn't disappoint. While in college, she "suffered a nervous breakdown and tried to commit suicide."

Unfortunately for our heroine, the treatment for her nervous breakdown involved six months in a hospital undergoing electroconvulsive therapy, which basically induces seizures in its patients. Fun stuff, huh? So fun that Plath referred to it heavily in her writing. "Now they light me up like an electric bulb. / For weeks I can remember nothing at all," is a line from "Poem For A Birthday," which explored her college suicide attempt. When Plath's husband left her for another woman, she kicked the writing into angsty overdrive-- we're talking, “Daddy, I have had to kill you. / You died before I had time—”

After publishing The Bell Jar, a novel that was basically autobiographical and focused on a young woman's suicide attempt, Plath killed herself by putting her head in the oven and turning on the gas. She was, as all really cool artists are, more famous in death than she was in life.

Virginia Woolf:

Virginia Woolf, who had a really cool last name, "strove to create a literary form that would convey inner life." Born in 1882, she was greatly effected by her mother's death in 1895-- she is believed to have suffered bipolar disorder from that time on. One of her more famous novels, Mrs. Dalloway, tells the story of two completely different people whose thoughts and feelings have intriguing parallels.

The novel ends with the suicide of one of those characters, and Plath's life ended in suicide as well. In 1941 she walked into the Ouse River and drowned, leaving a note behind that told her husband she was afraid she was going insane.

In 1962, years after her death, Woolf unknowingly lent her name to the title of an award-winning play, Edward Albee's "Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?" The play is about dysfunctional relationships, and is full of scathing abuse, both verbal and physical.

Now there's an upper!

Charlotte Bronte:

In my personal opinion, the fact that Bronte's novel Jane Eyre is considered "partly autobiographical" is enough to doom the poor woman to at least partial insanity (we're talking about a novel in which a young Jane is misunderstood and abused by her childhood guardians, unjustly labeled a liar at school, falls in love with a-- rather overbearing!-- man who is keeping a crazy wife in the attic, hears voices, sees ghosts, and ends up marrying Mr. Rochester after Ye Olde Crazy Wife commits suicide by setting fire to the house and jumping off a roof).

That is all. 

Charlotte Perkins Gilman:

Gilman's life was no picnic, beginning when her father left the family; Gilman was an infant at the time. This left two children, our own Ms. Charlotte and her brother, Thomas, in the care of mother Mary Perkins, who was not the most affectionate or maternal figure in the world, considering the fact that she "forbade her children to make strong friendships or read fiction," believing that this would prevent them for getting hurt, as she had. I'm not making this stuff up! In her autobiography, Gilman claimed that her mother only showed affection when she thought her daughter was asleep. 

Truthfully, her relationships didn't improve particularly as she got older. Gilman married Charles Walter Stetson, an artist, in 1884 (she'd initially declined his proposal, which as it turns out would've been the better idea), and had a child with him in 1885. Gilman suffered from intense post-partum depression after the birth of her daughter, and contacted a specialist, who prescribed the "rest cure." This "cure"-- and yes, I am using dubious quotation marks-- involved bed rest, isolation, and complete dependence on others (we're talking being fed by someone else, not leaving bed, and oh, heaven forbid any speaking whatsoever). When she was sent home, Gilman was under orders to limit her "intellectual conversation" and to never write again. 

Be fair to the lady. She gave it a shot. Of course, it resulted in deepened depression and suicidal urges, and in the end she and her husband decided that a separation was necessary. It was only after Gilman left her husband and spent time alone, with her daughter, in a completely different town, that her depression began to lift.

Years later, Gilman would write a short story about her depression and its "cure." It was called "The Yellow Wallpaper." 

(I got you, didn't I? There you were, reading along, when suddenly...BAM. Wallpaper.)

And, winner of the, "Rumors of My Insanity Have Been Greatly Exaggerated" prize, Ms. Emily Dickinson! 

Best known to this year's AP Lit students (heeeeeeeeeey guys!) as a female poet who used random capitalization, and whose poems can all be sung to the tune of the "Gilligan's Island" theme song (thanks, Ms. Hallberg!), Dickinson is notable for a couple of other things. She did not, for example, like to leave her house, staying in her home in Amherst for almost the entirety of her adult life.

But, contrary to popular belief, she wasn't a total recluse. She had normal things-- things like visitors! Friends! Family! She had an extremely close friendship with her sister-in-law, threw parties at which she entertained many guests, and kept up steady correspondence with an impressive number of people. And though the bulk of Dickinson's work-- we're talking close to 2,000 poems, here-- were officially published after her death, she sent plenty of those poems to friends and family while she was still alive. 

Well. There you have it. Intriguing, intelligent, talented women who were, collectively, a few sandwiches short of a picnic. Love 'em, hate 'em, or love to hate 'em, you have to admit they did, on occasion, bring the crazy. 

Silly Facebook quiz. You really missed out. ;]

In which BLERGH.

I'm scared, and mixed up, and sad, and frustrated, and it just kind of sucks.

But! I am glad it's summer. :]